Thursday, December 3, 2009

A Sad Day -GM's Birthday

Today was GM's Birthday. She and my dad got married when I was 14 years old. One year after my first mother died. Our relationship was rough for many years. I did not want another mother. I thought me and my dad would be fine. I did not need a "woman's influence" as my dad would say. When I was 29 years old I became a Christen I realized I needed to repair my damaged relationship with GM. I could look back and see how in her own way, she was a strong, independent woman. I asked her (and my dad for what it's worth) to forgive me for being literarily a terror. An unholy one at that. I asked her to stop talking about all the bad things I had ever done and to forgive me. She did. She never brought how rotten I was again. I learned to love and respect her. I admired GM as woman of strength. She was a head of her time. GM called me her "little country girl" I found that to be a great complement.

December 3, 2004, we gathered at Dad and GM's house to celebrate her birthday, and to put up Christmas decorations. She asked me to set up the Nativity because I was the "only one who knew where the pieces went." I was ecstatic that she gave me that honor. Although I knew (and she knew other family members knew how to set up the Nativity)

Her back was aching and she was planning on having surgery. The family was worried that she was not going to fair so well after a lengthy surgery.

We had a great celebration. It was fun putting up the stocking joking about who was going to get the coal and putting up the fake christmas tree. We sang Happy Birthday . But everyone in the family forgot their camera.

We all went home, dad and GM went to bed. I got a call early the next morning that GM was dead. I needed to get over to the house right away. I thought I was hearing things. How can she be dead? We just had her birthday party. How could this be?

She was still in bed in the same position she went to sleep in when I got there. She looked so peaceful. Our Grandma must of come to get her in her sleep. I stayed with her until the mortuary came and zipped her up in the body bag.

We had no photos of GM's last birthday. We didn't get to say goodbye and I love you.

The Christmas tree still had all her birthday presents under it, the stocking were hanging with care and the Nativity still had all the pieces in the right place. But our heart where broken and Christmas would never be the same again.

1 comment:

KARNA said...

Sweet post! How wonderful that she knew to give you the nativity set...she knew how special the birth of Christ was to said your goodbye's over the years as you apologized and then loved her as you let her into your life.