Sunday, February 8, 2009

THE RAT AND THE HERO

The other day I walked out of my house to get something out of my car, I noticed a cop pull up across the street. He got out of his car and walked out of sight. Well, no doubt I had to find out what was going on. To my shock and dismay the cop is standing over a big RAT in the middle of the street. He says a cat had it and dropped it when he got out of his car (how could a cat have a rat as big as a small child in his mouth? )The rat was stunned. 

The next thing I know I am screaming PULL OUT YOUR GUN AND SHOOT IT ! KILL IT!!! This cop was very young, looks like he just got out of high school. (I am still screaming SHOT IT over and over) he says "I can't do that" all the while he is nudging that rat towards my house. My mind is racing "GET IN YOUR CAR AND RUN IT OVER, FAST JUMP IN YOUR CAR AND RUN HIM OVER", the cop sweetly says "that would hurt him", YES KILL IT, THE RAT WON"T FEEL A THING YOU HAVE TO KILL HIM", the rat is getting closer to my house, " THE RAT MUST BE POISONED OR HAVE RABIES , IF YOU SEND HIM OVER HERE MY DOGS WILL EAT HIM, so you HAVE TO KILL IT!!! (The cop is not listening!) RATS ARE NOT SUPPOSE TO BE OUT DURING THE DAY LIGHT KILL IT. HE IS GOING TO CHEW THE WIRES AND HOLES IN MY HOUSE KILL IT! THE RAT IS THE BAD GUY KILL IT! 

The cop kindly says I am sorry I cant do that. The rat scurries to my next door neighbor Pete's driveway. The cop seems satisfied gets in his car and drives away. I am hyperventilating. Just about that time the neighborhood Stan the safety hero (who happens to be a decorated Vietnam veteran) comes out of his house and asked me what's going on. I tell him the about the rat and the cop . I asked Stand the safety hero to save me from the evil rat. Stan being the hero he is, grabs a shovel. YEAHHHHHHHHH, we are going to kill a rat I am thinking. We get up into Pete's e drive way and the rat starts to run away, all of a sudden I see the shovel go over Stan's head and I hear a CLUNK. DING DONG THE RAT IS DEAD,THE RAT IS DEAD! Stan the hero saves the day. He scoops the rat up and puts it in Pete's garbage can. The traumatic ordeal is over. I tell Stan how lucky I am to live next door to the brave. Later that day I call Stan to tell him again how thankful that we have a neighborhood hero. He tells me a few minuets later the cop comes back and starts looking for the rat. The cop gives up and goes away. I wonder why the cop came back? Maybe he decided he was going to kill the rat after all.   To late Stan gets all the glory!

1 comment: